What I’ve been struggling with lately is this:

You have to take photographs to be a photographer.

Seems pretty self-explanatory, doesn’t it?

Well, recently, I have definitely NOT been a photographer. I am not ashamed to admit that I have been feeling as though I am in the midst of a dry spell when it comes to finding inspiration or interesting things to capture through my lens. I’m not sure if it is because I’ve been extremely busy, or whether it goes deeper and I’m subconsciously taking a step back from the craft as a whole. If I’m being honest (which I hope to always be on this blog), then I would have to say that I haven’t felt the thrill of holding my camera and discovering sights and moments through it lately. I don’t know if it’s because I’m bored of it or my creativity has checked out or what.

Whatever it is, I’m feeling okay with it.

And that, in the same instance, scares me and thrills me.

For one, I am scared to think that my passion for photographing things and people could be extinguished so unexpectedly and so quickly. I am scared to admit that I am not always taking photos with endless creativity because if I do admit that, you (meaning the readers of this blog, my clients, my prospective clients, the population in general, etc.) may see me as a fake or a phony based on my claim that I am a photographer. If I have these bouts of indifference towards my camera, I am told (through other blogs or other photographers’ opinions) it means I am not a true photographer. And I so want to be! So it scares me to admit to the world that I am going through a photographic dry spell.

On the other hand, it also thrills me to think that I can accept this point in my life as being what it is and possibly just what it needs to be. It’s thrilling to think that I can be okay with putting the camera down for a while and living my life instead of just trying to record it. That I can embrace the dry spell, and start storing away little creative bits and pieces for another time when it may be more feasible for me to flesh them out and really work on them. I may just be at a stretch of road that doesn’t include photographs. And that can be okay.

Does that mean I’m giving up on this craft completely and that this whole time I’ve just been pretending to love it? Of course not. It just means that I am allowing myself to take a step back, let the inspiration come if it will, and not force it. I never produce really great work if I’m trying to force it, and I’m slowly learning this. 

So yes, while these recent moments in my life have been ones of photographic non-existence, I am learning to release the self-imposed pressure that comes with them, inwardly telling me that I need to produce something of interest and beauty and substance and I need to do it right this moment or else I’ll be exposed as a fraud. I’m allowing it to unfold and naturally happen if it will, without getting caught up in the “what will people think” trap. And trust me, that is a very hard thing for me to do, but I’m working on it.

The way I can do this is by remembering that I know that it will come back. I know that one day I’ll pick up my camera again and lovingly start shooting away. It will happen.

 

Busy busy!

Well, I wish I could say we’ve been up to amazing summer adventures and that’s why I haven’t posted anything in a while. The truth is that we’ve just been busy doing normal, everyday things that include hanging out at home, visiting with some friends and family, and working. A lot.

The boys are having fun in the backyard, we’re grilling and playing and, oh yeah, hanging all our clothes to dry on the line outside. Again.

Maybe that’s why I haven’t been blogging – because all of my extra blogging energy that I usually have has been sucked up by the laundry. Because we’ve been without a working dryer for almost 4 weeks now! We previously have had the same part in the dryer replaced 3 times, and so GE finally agreed to just replace the whole thing. Now it’s a waiting game, hoping the new dryer will get here soon and will finally WORK! Because as much as I love the simplicity and homey feel of line-dried laundry, I would like to go back to being able to do more than one load a day…

In other big Lakey family news – we’ve both gotten new callings at church! The hubby is now teaching the Deacons (12-13 year olds) while I am the Relief Society 2nd Counselor. They are both big changes for us, but we’re really excited for them! The hubby loves to work with the youth, and he’s been helping them to organize the sacrament passing duties a little better, since there was no real plan of action before. He wasn’t able to go to scout camp with them this last week because of work, but he’s looking forward to upcoming activities.

As for me, I don’t know how my name came up for this calling, but I’m actually really excited about it. I’m directly in charge of the activities, so I’ve been researching different activity ideas for the sisters, as we need to have a transfusion of new energy with regards to our meetings during the week. It’s a big job, but I’m very optimistic about where we can take it.

(If any of you creative types have ideas or blogs that have good activity ideas, please pass them along to me. Thanks!)

So yeah, that sums up my last couple of weeks in a nutshell.

But I’ve also been busy scrapping, wanna see?

This layout uses: From the Desk Of Collection Biggie, From the Desk Of Embellishment Mini 1 – Frames, ScrapSimple Embellishment Templates: Threadbare Shapes Biggie, and ScrapSimple Digital Layout Album Templates: 12x12 Mini Clusters.

This layout is from my birthday this year. I got to visit with my best friend Summer, and play games with her and the hubby, so that was a lot of fun. Plus, we ate at one of my favorite local restaurants, Anchos, which has the yummiest tortillas.

This layout uses: Seascape Collection, ScrapSimple Tools - Actions: Stacked Photos PS Mini 6501, ScrapSimple Tools - Styles: Sand 6501 Biggie, ScrapSimple Embellishment Templates: Sweet Flowers, and By the Sea Collection Mini.

This one is of a picture from a while back (two years ago now!) of E at the beach. I sometimes miss those days when we lived only 15 minutes away from the beach and could just jump in the car and drive down for a few hours at a time. I am still grateful that we’re still only a car-ride away from the same beaches, it’s just a little longer these days.

This layout uses: Scenic Route Collection Biggie, ScrapSimple Paper Templates: Textured Paint, Dynamic Brush Set: Textured 8201, A Gardener's Diary Collection
Rustique Collection Biggie, Falling Leaves Collection Mini, Noteworthy Collection Biggie and Brush Set: Flowers in Silhouette 1.

Okay, this one still makes me laugh whenever I see it! One day E was complaining that he wanted to go to school NOW, he did not want to wait until he was older. I explained to him (for the thousandth time) that he had to be older to go to the school down the street with the big kids and that he would just have to be patient and wait. But he came up with a better idea. A little later in the day, he asked me to make him a beard from construction paper. By this time I had forgotten all about the earlier school conversation, so I complied without really thinking about it, assuming he just wanted to dress up or something.

Then E found what looked like an ‘old man hat’ to him, put that on along with the beard, and came over to me and said, “Mom, now I can go to school because I’m older!”

I seriously was busting up laughing, a) because he’s so dang cute in that beard and old man hat, and b) because he’s so very smart and always thinking up solutions to any sort of problem or obstacle that we try to put in his way. I really love that about him (and hate it sometimes, too). But he sure keeps my life interesting!

This layout uses: Bespoke Collection, Bespoke Solids Paper Mini, Zac and Sarah Collection Biggie, ScrapSimple Embellishment Templates: Just Strings, ScrapSimple Tools - Actions: Magnetic Poetry 5001, ScrapSimple Paper Templates: Sew Torn Up, and Cruising Collection.

This layout is in honor of my little brother, who is coming home from his church mission very, very soon! I haven’t seen him and 2 years, and although I still have to wait until Christmas to do so, I’m excited for him to get home and get back into the swing of life. He’ll only have a week or two to acclimate back to normal life before he’s whisked back off to college and the fun life. :) I’m sure he’ll have a different perspective on things now that he’s gone through this experience, but I know that he’ll have lots of fun and still be quite the lady charmer.

These photos are ones of him riding this huge skateboard that he sent back to us one day and I love the caption he wrote for them: “It’s amazing that I can still find time to skateboard out here.” Too cute.

Well, that’s pretty much what life has been like for us recently. We’re glad that things are going well on the work front for the hubby, and the return of the RAISE this year! It’s truly a blessing, as we did not receive one last year and it really threw our financial plans out of whack. But now things are all good and we’re happy to be where we are.

Unless, of course, you know of a great IT managing jobs in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area, let me know!!! :D

No one could recognize us…

When we were on our road trip to Texas, we stopped for lunch at Wendy’s one day. The toy that the boys got was a great disguise! Every time I would look in the rear view mirror that day, E was wearing it and it cracked me up!

 

I had to get in on the action, too. It’s tough taking a disguised self-portrait, however.

Here, you try them on!

 

Hope this little bit of silliness brings a smile to your face today.

I love my Texas!

But truly, I love my family more. :)

This week we rolled back into town from our road trip to visit my family in Dallas. We got together to celebrate the blessing of my newest little niece, Sophia (or as she’s known around these parts, Sophie). The whole family was there, except for our beloved Tom, who is currently serving a mission in Idaho for our church. It was really sad to have him not there, but that problem will be remedied this Christmas!

Anyways, we spent the week at my sister’s house (thanks, Em!) and got to have cousin playtime (E still hasn’t stopped talking about how he misses his cousins), take pictures, visit fun sites, and most importantly, eat some really great food. I was just glad to soak up the sister time, I sure miss them when we’re away from each other!

And since I’m sure you’re just dying to sit and watch my vacation slideshow (haha), here are some pictures from the trip:

Here is the whole group, after watching the running (or strolling, ahem) of the steers through the Ft. Worth stockyards. Me, the hubby, and the two kiddos didn’t make it in time to see them going through town, but were told we didn’t miss much…

The cousins, hanging out and being cool. This is the closest I could get to a photo of them together right then, it was hilarious.

Here’s sweet little Sophie, trying to stay cool and stylish (I think she succeeded at both!).

There was this cute little racing horse that cousin A rode, and W wanted to help make it ‘go’.

And much to my surprise, when cousin N was riding it, Grandpa put W on the back with him and he loved it! But then again, I should have known beforehand, since he is our little daredevil child.

They also had this wooden maze that the boys decided to try. I think Nathan was the most excited to do it, though – this type of thing is right up his alley. And even though it was hot and humid, they had a fun time. Us spectators got to go up to a viewing platform and watch as they made wrong turns all over the place did an awesome job on the tough maze!

 

Nathan got a gold star to show that he completed the maze. The best part? Finding out that the maze had been featured in the Amazing Race, one of our very favorite TV shows! So now we know Nathan and I could do well on it, ha! Or at least, he could. I’d just argue and slow us down, but it would make for good TV!

Apparently this is where you go when you get caught cheating at the maze. They all look so sad, don’t they?

If you’ve made it this far in the commentary, congratulations! It only goes on more from here. Don’t say I didn’t warn you…

After that, we decided to roam around the little touristy area, complete with cute little shops and fun places to take pictures. Case in point:

And yes, I was probably jumping up and down like a crazy person to get them to smile for me in these pictures. But a photographer’s gotta do what a photographer’s gotta do! ;)

Cute cousins who loved being together!

Aunt A and Uncle J couldn’t help but get in on the action. I think these should be their Facebook profile pics, don’t you?

A rare smiling W with Uncle J. It took him a long time to warm up to his extended family, but towards the end of the week it got better, and he was able to un-stick himself from me long enough to hang out with Nana, Grandpa, and his aunts and uncle. For a few minutes at a time, at least.

Here’s Ang getting her psychic reading from “Pappy”. I think he told her to not fall in love with anyone at EFY, but I don’t think she heeded his advice…

You gotta enjoy the yummy DP!

The boys loved going on the carousel rides, and Grandpa was only too happy to oblige by using up his quarter supply on the cute cousins.

We saw some actual longhorns over in their pen, but only one ventured close enough to hang with us. The rest seemed a little snobby if you ask me, keeping their distances from us. Must be because we’re from out of town or something.

W was excited to see them!

The hubby was excited to read more information about them. So much like my dad, it makes me laugh.

There he goes again, our little daredevil baby. Maybe he’s practicing to be a real cowboy when he grows up. They have to sit on fences a lot, don’t they? :)

J takes his Uncle responsibilities very seriously, as seen here. Little cousin A loved getting a bird’s eye view!

And that pretty much does it for that day of the trip. I really didn’t take that many pictures of the things we did. I guess I was having too much fun experiencing it to stop and get out my bulky camera to capture it. And I’m completely fine with that. And besides, we’ve got other people in the family who took lots of photos, so maybe I can bum a few from them. Right, Em? :)

ready for some beauty?

Click on the photo to see more of this beautiful senior session that I recently took (and I’ll let you in on a little secret – I’m lucky enough to share genes with her! She’s my sister.).

I hope, for your sake, that you can’t relate

You know what I hate?

Having to wash a load of laundry twice because I forgot about it, letting it sit overnight in the washer to get sour and yucky.

But do you know what I really hate?

Having to wash a load of laundry thrice (yeah, I said it) because I forgot about it a second time, letting it sit all day in the washer after re-washing it from sitting all night in the washer the previous night, getting sour and yucky.

Yep, that’s my life. Awesome.

But on a happier note, I am spending some time going through the few (HA!) photos that I took while on vacation with my family last week. We all congregated in our beloved state of Texas, home to two of my sisters (in the same city no less) who make me very jealous that they get to have Sunday dinners with each other now. And although I suffered the casualty of losing one of my new 16GB memory cards from my camera, I was lucky that there weren’t any of the trip photos on it.

Insert huge sigh of relief here.

My only hope is that some maid at the Sheraton in Albuquerque finds it, laughs at the family photos on it, and calls me back. Hey, I can dream, can’t I?

I will be sure to share the photos that I didn’t lose in the next couple of days. I’ve also got a treat – some senior pictures of my gorgeous little sister, who is still, like, 11 years old, so how can she be a senior in high school this year??

Seriously, time, slow down. You’re not impressing anyone with your speed. We get it, you’re fast and cool. Now knock it off, or else I’m going to turn around one of these days and have a senior in high school for a son!

I always hate coming up with a title....

Here's an updated Wordle of this blog. Interesting to see what appears...


Oh, and I can't wait! This next week I'm going to have some family portraits done by the famous Emily Murdock! Heck, I'll just be glad to have someone talented there to take photos for us so that I don't have to use the tripod for our updated family photos!

I'll be sure to share when they're ready. :)

I Scream, You Scream...

E just got his very first ice cream treat from the ice cream man this week! He was so excited to sit outside and wait for him to come down our street, and was thrilled when he got to choose his own ice cream! Of course, he went for the Spongebob one.

And you can't tell by the photo, but he was happy! :)

I wish I would have gotten pictures of him getting it from the truck, but alas, I had a toddler to wrangle, hoping that he wouldn't get run over by the truck on his way out. :)

Hey Strangers!

Dude! Sorry it’s been way too long since I last posted. I wish I could say that we’ve been terribly busy, but we’ve only been mildly busy. I’ve just been lazy and haven’t taken photos of too many things. :)

But here’s what we have been doing:

Ali and Jed came down for a fun visit and we played outside with bubbles!

And then we got to go to the Long Beach Aquarium!

We’ve been stacking crazy cup towers,

 

taking walks around the block in our red wagon,

and playing Guitar Hero with Dad in our underwear (Not me, just the boy, haha!).

 

And yes, there is a theme here, E really likes to hang out in his underwear. We’re trying to work on that one, but he’s four. Whaddya gonna do? :)

I’ve also been busy recovering our dining room chairs from this:

to this!

I really love the fabric and was surprised at how great they turned out. I love reading crafty blogs and getting great ideas, but it’s a rarity when I actually do something myself, haha. So I’m proud of myself getting these done! Go me! :)

We’ve also been swimming at the pool (pictures are all on my new phone, so I’ll upload them when I learn how!), meeting our new preschool teacher (E’s going to be starting in the fall and I’m way excited for him), and planning an upcoming trip to Texas! I can’t wait, we’re going to get to hang out with my family and have tons of fun. We’ll miss Tom, but we’ll see him soon enough. :)

So yeah, that’s what we’ve been up to lately.

My sister is here. 'Nuff said.